Wanted: Personal Assistant

Sarcastic, neat freak seeks assistant to help with daily duties. Duties to include, but not limited to:

Cooking, cleaning, forcing me to exercise and eat right. Take great pictures for Tasty Tuesday posts. Must love dogs and be willing to play fetch or tug of war with a moment's notice.

Skills required:

Must like to cook and read. Prefers someone with crafty skills (but not absolutely necessary). Doesn't mind text communications and will not respond with "k, r, or u" as that will get you fired. Must be willing to take exams and do homework for me. Sarcastic writing skills a plus. Must be willing to answer my phone calls no matter what time it is received and no matter what you are in the middle of. Don't expect to have a life that doesn't revolve around keeping me on task.

To apply for the position, please send your resume, writing samples, and college transcripts to 40littlemoments at gmail.com. Please include your favorite flavor of cupcake, cookie, pie, cake or other dessert. Payment is dependent on whether or not I'm in the mood to cook you something and how well you keep my grades up.

If you are not willing to show up at 2am to an undisclosed location and bring a shovel, trash bags, and snacks, please do not apply.

25 Random Facts About Me

      1.       Ketchup is it’s own food group. There isn’t much I don’t eat without ketchup.

2.       I wanted to be a farmer when I grew up. I still wouldn’t complain if that happened.

3.       I hate shopping. I only go out of absolute necessity.

4.       I taught myself to sew 18 months ago. I can also cross stitch and crochet.

5.       I love taking pictures. Love. Yet I hate scrapbooking.

6.       I love to cook. I think it would be fun to own a bakery or restaurant.

7.       I can read a book and watch a movie at the same time, and tell you what is happening in both.

8.       My favorite color is blue. Most everything I own is pink and has lace or ruffles.

9.       When I am really stressed out, I like to clean. I’m talking about taking a toothbrush to the grout lines and moving the furniture and washing everything. I can decompress and work through whatever is bothering me by the time I’m done.

10.   I love tulips. And Orchids.

11.   Right now I should be studying for an accounting exam.

12.   Part of me still finds it hard to believe that I’m just a few semesters away from a college degree. It’s very surreal.

13.   I have 3 dogs. In a perfect world where I had billions of dollars and more space, I’d probably have a whole lot more. I’ve never not had a dog, and I can’t imagine that will ever change.

14.   I love to decorate for holidays. Valentine’s Day, St. Patrick’s Day, Easter, 4^th of July, Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas. I even have decorations for Memorial Day, Labor Day, and Graduation!

15.   I’ve always wanted to be able to paint. I see these amazing things and would love to be able to recreate them.  

16.   I don’t watch much TV. But with the exception of Army Wives, Little Couple, and Food Network, everything I do watch involves murder.

17.   I miss my grandparents. I’d like to have just a day to spend with them and catch up. I know it wouldn’t be enough time, but I’d like to know what they think of where I am in my life now.

18.   I would love to be outgoing. I’m an introvert. I’m a crazy, scary introvert. I’m not so bad when you get to know me…except that I second guess everything and over analyze everything.

19.   I wanted to go back to college and every time I have tons of homework I hate it and want to quit.

20.   I don’t mind being the oldest student in most of my classes.

21.   I’m not a morning person. Even if I went to bed early enough to get 12 hours of sleep to get up at 5 am, I’d still hate it.

22.   I’ve never, ever, ever had a pedicure.

23.   I like plants. Especially indoor plants. I hope the house we buy has tons of natural light so I can have an indoor tree.

24.   I love to read. Love. From the end of the Spring semester until the Fall semester began, I read 64 books. I re-read every book by Carol Higgins Clark, The Hunger Games Trilogy, and 50 Shades of Gray. As well as ton of new books.

25.   I have a love/hate relationship with my job. I love that it’s slow enough that I can get homework done while I’m here. But during breaks, I hate it, because I can think of all the things at home that I’ve neglected while school has been going on that I could be doing instead. I’ll be glad to finish my degree and move on with the next chapter of my career.